Humility is the New Smart
(Day 3) Rethinking Human Excellence in the Smart Machine Age
Day 3 – Quieting Your Ego
Hi again!
Yesterday we learned about humility and how it’s actually a strength. Today, let’s talk about something that can get in the way of humility: our ego.
What Is Ego?
Ego is that voice inside your head that wants to always be right. It’s the part of you that wants to win every argument, look smart all the time, and never admit you made a mistake.
Your ego doesn’t like it when other people get credit or when someone knows something you don’t.
We all have an ego. It’s normal and human. The problem happens when our ego becomes too loud and starts controlling how we act at work.
How Ego Hurts Us at Work
When your ego is in charge, several things happen that can hurt your career:
You stop listening: Instead of really hearing what others say, you’re busy thinking about what you’ll say next to prove you’re right. You miss good ideas and important information.
You avoid asking questions: Your ego tells you that asking questions makes you look weak or stupid. So you pretend to understand things you don’t really understand.
You take credit for everything: When something goes well, your ego wants all the praise. When something goes wrong, your ego wants to blame someone else.
You argue too much: Your ego sees every conversation as a battle to win. You spend more time fighting than working together.
You don’t admit mistakes: Your ego won’t let you say “I was wrong” even when you clearly made an error. This makes problems worse and breaks trust with your team.
What Happens When Someone’s Ego Is Too Big?
Think about someone you know who always has to be right. How does it feel to work with them? Most people find it exhausting and frustrating. They stop sharing ideas because they know this person will either argue or take credit. They stop asking this person for help because they’re afraid of being made to feel stupid.
People with big egos often think they’re being strong leaders. But really, they’re pushing people away and missing chances to learn and grow.
How to Quiet Your Ego
The good news is that you can learn to quiet your ego. Here are some ways to do it:
Listen more than you talk: When someone is speaking, focus completely on understanding them. Don’t think about what you’ll say next.
Ask questions instead of giving answers: When someone brings up a problem, ask “What do you think we should do?” instead of immediately telling them what to do.
Give credit to others: When your team does something well, make sure everyone gets recognized for their part.
Admit when you’re wrong: When you make a mistake, say so quickly and clearly. Don’t make excuses.
Say “I don’t know”: Remember yesterday’s lesson? This is ego-quieting in action.
Why Quieting Your Ego Makes You Stronger
When you quiet your ego, amazing things happen:
You learn faster: Because you’re open to new ideas and feedback
People trust you more: Because you’re honest about your mistakes and limitations
You make better decisions: Because you get input from others instead of relying only on your own thoughts
Your team works better: Because people feel heard and valued
You become a better leader: Because people want to follow someone who listens and cares about their ideas
The Ego Trap
Here’s something tricky about ego: it often feels like you’re being strong when you’re really being weak. It feels powerful to always be right, but it actually makes you less effective. It feels smart to have all the answers, but it actually stops you from learning.
Key Idea
Quieting your ego helps you grow faster and build better relationships. When you’re not worried about looking smart all the time, you can focus on actually becoming smarter.
Reflection
What happens when someone always has to be right? How does it feel to work with them?
Think about your own experiences. Have you ever avoided sharing an idea with someone because you knew they would argue or take credit? Have you ever stopped asking someone for help because they made you feel bad about not knowing something?
Now think about people you enjoy working with. They probably listen well, ask good questions, and make you feel valued. These are people who have learned to quiet their ego.
Today’s Application
Here’s your challenge for today: Try to catch your ego in action.
Pay attention to moments when you feel the need to “win” a conversation or prove you’re right. When you notice this feeling, stop and ask yourself, “What can I learn here instead?”
This isn’t easy. Your ego will fight back. But each time you choose learning over winning, you’re becoming more NewSmart.
Quieting your ego is a superpower in the NewSmart world.
Coming Up Next
Tomorrow, we’ll explore how lifelong learning plays a critical role in the NewSmart!
Keep practicing!